Recover from Hoarding: Simple Steps to Reclaim Your Space from Clutter

How comfortable are you with space?

Do you cover every surface in trinkets, mementos or useful bits and bobs? Do you amass unfinished 'dream' projects, will-sort-out-some-day piles of mess, old baggage and useless clutter? Do your cupboards moan? And do your wardrobes scream?

People who hoard may find it challenging to sort through or discard possessions. Past experiences of loss, neglect, or abuse can generate a fear of letting go in the present. Possessions become a source of comfort, security, and identity, compensating for emotional voids. This holding on is understandable, if we have experienced insecurity, uncertainty, bereavement, or fear. We might want to surround and insulate ourselves with things, objects, and projects to keep us busy, and even comforted.

In some ways, it can be a healthy coping mechanism to surround yourself with what you love, and things that divert your attention to something positive. I believe that beautiful surroundings are a human need. Still, if you're feeling overwhelmed by all the unread books, unfiled papers, unneeded or just-in-case items, old clothes, or whatever, and if you feel all the space in your home is getting eaten up, then you may discover that your possessions are limiting your well-being.

If you're reading this article it's likely because you want to start de-cluttering and simplify your space but don't know where to start. Here are some guidelines:

1. Breaking the cycle of hoarding requires some looking into your heart. When you know what is motivating the hoarding, and process the emotions, it becomes easier to let go. It may be difficult and challenging, however you can learn to let go of the emotions, and the clutter.

2. If you want to start de-cluttering, you might like to do it gradually. Instead of overwhelming yourself with decluttering tasks, simply start small, tackling one area at a time - even if it's just one drawer or a cupboard. Setting achievable goals reduces anxiety and builds momentum. 

3. When you're decluttering, you could sort possessions into categories (e.g., keep, donate, discard). Categorising as you go, helps to prioritise and make decisions about what to keep and what to let go of.

4. You may have to be fiercely compassionate with yourself, if you find yourself thinking: "I might need it someday" or "It has memories." Challenging these beliefs with reasoning, or affirmations, such as "I am willing to take the risk" or "all things pass" may help you to let go.

5. Sentimental items pose a unique challenge due to their emotional significance. You may want to separate out sentimental items and sort through them last. Then, you could practise selective retention i.e. identify a few key sentimental items that hold the most meaning and let go of the rest. 

6. You can also consider digitising sentimental items like photographs or letters to preserve memories without taking up physical space. Another solution is to practise display and rotation; keeping a small box of sentimental items and displaying only a few at a time in rotation means you can focus on them and enjoy them much more, without being distracted by additional clutter.

7. When letting things go, remember these items have had a special place in your life, and you've imbued them with some of yourself, some of your emotions and memories. So, stay grounded in your determination to let go, but respect the emotions and memories, and the items as you discard them. Practise gratitude to the effect of "thank you, and I now release you."

8. Tidying and cleaning doesn't have to be a chore. It can be an act of care and love. Some spiritual folk talk about "space harmonising" or "energetic clearing" i.e. making room for the good in life to enter. It is an age-old saying that cleaning is good for the soul. One way to keep on top of the clutter in your home, and keep it clean and tidy is to practise the 'Space Reset'. Every evening before you go to bed, reset all the spaces in your home to the level of comfort and tidiness you would like to wake up to. If you have time, you can also practise space resets at other points in the day as well. Reminding yourself of the words "Space Reset" before you leave a room can be a helpful cue to leave it as you found it.

9. Enjoy living slowly and mindfully. You have time to care for your home, you have time to care for yourself. This is your life. Take it easy. It doesn't have to be perfect, but you can enjoy beautifying your home.

10. Reduce distractions. Caring for your space at home, keeping it clean and tidy, shouldn't be a distraction from life outside your home, and your life outside shouldn't be a distraction when you're at home. Find the balance. Live in the now. Live fully. It's an art.

That's all! And, remember, it's ok to ask a friend or a professional for help if you need it.


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